Bastian is a New York City based Harold Team at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre. They were formed January 23rd, 2007 and debuted on February 13. As of July, 2009 they are one month behind Creep for the record of longest running Harold team in UCBT history.
Adam Frucci, Molly Lloyd, Brian Barrett,, Oscar Magallanes, Lydia Hensler, John Murray, Abra Tabak, Erik Tanouye. Abra joined Bastian on January 9th, 2009 after Maggie Carrey moved to LA to write for the sitcom "In the Motherhood." Erik joined Bastian on September 10th, 2009 after Brandon Gardner joined Reuben Williams.
- Intro: "Ante Up" by M.O.P (Longtime Intro: "Let's Dance" by David Bowie)
- Outro: "Your Love (Keeps Lifting Me Higher)" by Michael MacDonald (Longtime Outro: "Take Me Home Tonight" by Eddie Money)
- Bastian is the oldest Harold team currently at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre.
- Their starter name was Taxi Slide.
- Bastian's coaches have been (in order) Chris Gethard, Shannon O'Neill, Gavin Speiller and Joe Wengert.
- Bastian's original lineup's average height was 71.875 inches or just a hair under six feet tall making them one of the tallest UCB Harold Teams ever.
- At the time of publication, none of Bastian's parents have ever been divorced.
- Brandon, Brian and Oscar currently live together.
- As of August 18th, 2009 Bastian has performed 89 Harold Night Harolds together. One short of Creep's 90.
- A "Film School" Harold in which every scene was a student's film project.
- A "Time Table" Harold in which every scene started and ended according to a strict schedule. It was discovered that this schedule was being kept by Brian Barrett's super-agent character "Saul Murray" and his personal assistant.
- Bastian's first Cagematch victory over The Stepfathers in which John Murray arrived with only minutes left to re-enact a scene from "Ghost" and kiss Brian Barrett on the mouth.
- A Harold that was a play set in a prison, performed by actor's in a community theater group. The third beats/Third Act was a Musical.
- A Harold following the stories behind three violent crime scenes. In the third beats, different performers played the parts in overly dramatic re-enactments of the previous scenes.